We all know people who are very good at complaining. They have the ability to know exactly what is wrong with something. And they are also very adept at knowing who to express their negative opinion to. Yes, they are the Complainers!

But there are a good number of people who are not ‘good’ at this phenomenon of complaints. They will mourn, share the pain, and complain to just about anyone. Anytime. About anything!

His themes of these woe-me drones generally fall into the category of how ‘unfair’ something is. They are always looking for new topics to complain and complain about. We all know people who if they didn’t have something to complain about, they wouldn’t have anything to say!

If you’re setting your sights on being a ‘positive person’, it can be difficult at first to get out of the habit of complaining. But with practice and mindful attention, you can ‘get back on your feet’ before launching into a tirade of pointless complaints. Here are a couple of suggestions to help the complainer take a well-deserved vacation.

First, voice your complaint only to someone who is capable of doing something about it. Are you really tired of escalating airline prices and expensive booking fees? Well, your neighbor can’t fix the problem, so why not direct this concern to someone who can, like the people who run the airline?

When you ‘complain effectively’, you are keeping your conversations on a positive track. So you’re not just blowing off steam (which really only increases your pent-up hostility). Directing your complaints to the right party could go a long way! Strive not to be one of those individuals who literally have nothing to say if they don’t complain.

Second, try to give a compliment as often as you voice a complaint. This step will reduce the balance of inner negativity that is building and make a healthy deposit in the positive emotional health account.

If you routinely send an email grumbling and complaining about the lack of service you’ve received, try balancing the ‘karma’ with a letter of praise. This complementary recognition can be a completely different company or person. The important thing is to do it.

If you’re not satisfied with the service you’re receiving at the restaurant, and you’re expressing your dissatisfaction quite a bit, try to find something to praise and say that to the waitress as well. Try it! Balance the energies.

And here’s a little idea. If you start the activity with a compliment instead of a complaint, you may be surprised that the entire event goes better than you anticipated. The recipient of the compliments is now more receptive to you and may even try harder to please you. And if something goes wrong and you feel compelled to voice your concern, your complaint now falls on more receptive ears and you’re more inclined to correct it.

A second and perhaps more important benefit of praising before complaining is that you’ll actually be looking for positive things to say. When you are in tune with what is ‘right’ instead of what is wrong, your whole way of thinking has changed. You are now attuned to, and observing, the positive things in life and you may find yourself actively looking for the good in every situation!