Why doesn’t the Universe just give me what I want?

Why doesn’t the Law of Attraction work?

You know that you have ever asked yourself these or similar questions.

We are quite clear about what we want. We want a loving society. We want money in the bank. We want a house on the beach. We want the right and perfect career. We want our team to win the game. We want to throw these damn 10 pounds.

God, Spirit, the Universe, our Essence or Higher Self, the unified field (whoever or whatever we believe to be the force that gives or does not give) does not seem to be listening.

The truth is that we all have stories that we tell about why we have or don’t have the things we want. We may not be aware of these stories because to us they appear to be so. And no positive force in the universe will act against those stories, because to do so would be an act of violence against our creative nature, and because all too often pushing against stories has the rebound effect of making us cling to them more. Stories play like background music in our hearts and minds and influence everything we think, say and do.

Some of the popular themes of the stories we tell are:

• I need to EARN what I receive. No bread, no profit.
• Life has ups and downs. If we didn’t have the downs, we wouldn’t be able to appreciate the ups.
• The spirit knows better than me, and if I don’t get what I think I want, it must be because it’s not in my best interest.
• There are lessons I must learn before I can receive what I want. However, not getting what I want is teaching me necessary lessons.
• The Universe does not like that we want material things.
• It is not noble to receive what we want; it is better to do without. We will be rewarded later.
• It’s not okay for me to get the things I want when other people are hurting.
• The proper use of this life is the mortification of the flesh; when we want things we are only showing our weakness and unworthiness. (If you don’t believe this, do a quick Google search for fundamentalist religious groups.)
• I’m doing something wrong and that’s why I can’t manifest my dreams.
• If I get what I want now, I’ll pay for it later.

From a Universal perspective, these are just stories. The Universe does not judge you. If that is what we want to tell ourselves about life, that is our prerogative, and the Universe will deliver as we create an entire existence around it. But from a Universal perspective, these are not Truths. And from that perspective, these must be difficult to navigate.

I often hear stories from my clients about what life is like. “I don’t have much luck with love or money.” “Life sucks, and that’s the way it is.” “My poor eyesight, hearing, or memory is just part of aging.” “I’m just a happy-go-lucky person; I don’t handle responsibilities very well.” “My family is abusive.” “I just don’t have the energy that I used to have.”

The last thing I want to do, as a Trainer, is feed these stories in any way. They are limiting. They are not true and they cause my clients anguish and misery. So I can’t agree with your assessment, as the Universe really can’t agree with the limiting stories we tell ourselves. But I also don’t want to contradict my clients. Doing that will risk a defensive reaction, and I know it’s counterproductive to put my clients in a position where they’re going to stand on their heels and to insist that the story is true. I have heard clients go on at length with long lists of evidence that their story is the absolute TRUTH.

I know that my clients, like people all over the world, are doing something mysterious and wonderful with this opportunity we call life on Earth. I don’t know what it is exactly, but I want to respect everyone’s unique approach to discovering it for themselves. So I try, as I imagine the forces of the Universe do on a much larger scale, to hold a different story for my clients in my heart. I offer it as an idea when there is an opening, but mostly I do my best to see them and their lives as limitless, untrammeled by history, unembedded by history.

I imagine that the Universe does the same for each one of us, patiently waiting eternities for us to mature into the stories we tell ourselves. The next time we wonder why the Universe isn’t giving us what we want, we may want to dig deeper into the stories we’re telling ourselves and question our assumptions about what’s true. We may find a way to remove limitations and joyfully receive whatever we desire.